At university, I finished my
first year with a first, averaging at 78%, and stayed in Liverpool beyond my
exams because I finally felt that Liverpool was home to me and that God has put
me in the right city. I also got to enjoy the amazing hot extended summer here
in the UK, both in Liverpool and back at home.
I travelled more than I thought I
ever would, which mounted up to 60 days of the year (this adds up to just over
8 weeks of the year). I got to explore the city of York for the first time, I
visited my cousin in Germany, after my last visit was four years ago, I had a
family holiday in the lovely Keswick, I went to the festival Big Church Day Out,
I went on holiday to France and got to explore the beautiful south coast, I
attended the Keswick convention, I was a leader for the second year running at
Cumbria Christian Youth Camp, I had an amazing holiday in St Ives and I visited
London twice: to see my cousin and to watch some shows at the West End.
However, my greatest achievement
this year has hands down been the fact that I have led people in worship this
year. After finding out at the end of 2017 that this would be my responsibility
within the Christian Union, I assumed that I would just about get by in this
role, but it wouldn’t be anything special. How wrong was I back then?
I didn’t have to wait long for my
first experience of leading worship as I was thrown into it unexpectedly in
March because of a misunderstanding. Looking back, this experience certainly
wasn’t an error, but rather it was an opportunity that God had given to me.
Overtime, I was able to really
grow in confidence with both having to play my guitar and sing in the presence
of other people. I even bought myself a new guitar because deep down I knew
that this was what God wanted me to do and I should start taking it seriously.
The new guitar was so beneficial
for the new academic year in September as I took over as worship coordinator at
the Christian Union. I started off with very little confidence to play in front
everyone watching, and I struggled to feel like I had the authority to lead
everyone else. The CU weekend away was such a beneficial experience for me as I
was able to follow someone else’s lead and not have to worry about making
mistakes in front of an audience. It did take a few weeks, but eventually I
felt comfortable leading worship at CU as I grew in confidence both in leading
the band and in leading to everyone else.
And how could I forget that we
got a new worship pastor at our church this year? When it was first announced
in January, I was adamant that I would not be getting involved with the worship
team at St James in the City because I assumed the worst about whoever was
taking over, presuming them to be a perfectionist who wouldn’t be interested in
beginners, so it has definitely been a shock to look back at 2018 as someone
who is fully emerged in the worship team at their university church!
Even when I joined the worship
team in October 2018, I felt that as a complete beginner, I would need about
two years of just playing in the team before I would be capable of leading worship
myself. My first experience in the team had gone well, and I enjoyed following
the lead of the worship pastor, so I got complacent with this idea that I could
sail through and enjoy helping out. Of course, God had other plans because in
November, I was faced with what was a tough decision for me at the time: do I
lead one song the next time I would be in the worship team or not? After a lot
of prayerful consideration, I decided to lead worship at the front of church,
which was a huge step for me, but it was definitely the best decision because
of how connected I felt to God whilst I was leading, and the amazing response
that I had from others.
How could I ever doubt that God wouldn’t have delivered
100% for me? I am currently laughing inside at how wrong I have been with the
plans that I have wanted for my life versus what God already has planned for
me. I needn’t say more other than God definitely wins!
My 2018 has been filled with so
many experiences that have shaped me into a more confident person and a bold
and faithful servant and I am in awe at how successful of a year I have had.
Looking into 2019, I am finally able to trust in the plans that God has for me
and know that even though I don’t know what will happen, He is always working
for the good of those who love him, and who have been called according to His
purpose!
